I'm not ugly!!!

haha.

I've been taught that i was ugly ever since i was a kid. It still affects me today. i've been a victim of verbal abuse by a lot of people over a very long time. Only through therapy and prayer was I able to heal from the scars of my past. I still deal with the pain as I type right now. because of my past, I often deal with bouts of depression. Only in rare moments do I have a glimpse of self-esteem. You can say i am still hurting from my sordid past.

However, because of my "supposed ugliness" I have learned about my inner self. I know I am not like the average person walking down the street. I am now learning to accept the existance of my inner self instead of its denial. Only through years of therapy and lonliness did I grasp the flipside of things. I am learning it in a less painful way to accept myself.

I am learning that it is important to be beautiful on the inside. i am learning that i am unique. i am learning about the silver lining. I am learning who i truly am after years of asking,"who am i?"
As for the beautiful people,  I feel sorry for them. They will live their lives in ignorance. They will rely on something that will ware down after 50 years or more. Not me. I will have a backup system. its called personality.